I have noticed that when someone brings to light abuse in a Christian setting, often that person is roundly criticized for making things ugly and messy.
I want to challenge this perspective.
When there is abuse in a Christian setting, it is not the whistle-blower who is to blame.
Think about it for a moment.
Why should the person bringing the abuse to light be held responsible for the resulting mess?
Would we prefer that the abuse continue under the radar?
Why do we find it so difficult to hold the abuser responsible for the mess?
How do we picture that it should look when abuse is brought to light?
When someone experiences spiritual abuse, the pain marks them, for years.
When we blame them for the mess, we pile on additional pain, confusion, and condemnation.
When we treat the abuser with extreme care and treat the whistle-blower with suspicion and hostility, we hit the whistle-blower emotionally in the middle of their open wound.
The pain is deep and shocking and lasting. It is a very lonely and shattering place to be.
“We hit the whistle-blower emotionally in the middle of their open wound.”
We can do better than this. We can stop protecting abusers and start listening to those who bring the abuse to light.
If you are in a Christian organization and someone brings abuse to light, please do not blame the whistle-blower for the mess. He or she is not responsible for the mess.
It is an act of love to bring abuse to light. Receive it as love.
Help your organization to walk in the light. Call the abuser to accountability. Help the whistle-blower on the long journey of healing.
About: Jenny Switkes is a professor of mathematics at California State Polytechnic University, Pomona, where she has the joy of mentoring many first-generation college students from diverse backgrounds. She also serves as a volunteer pastor at Rise OC Church in Costa Mesa, California.
Photo by FreeImages.com/Jenny Rollo.